In a blur
I am good at making decisions, even if they come with headaches and sleepless nights. Lately, I have been working on a crazy project. At the beginning, I was enthralled. It was like forging myself anew, like putting a foot on the rung of a ladder that led up into blue and endless skies. One day I realized that instead of rising, I was sinking into a gloomy hole with no sign of real life in sight. The project was sapping my strength. Morevoer, I was losing my ability to determine right from wrong, to distinguish what I really wanted from what I was pursuing. My inner desires were still in that delightful spot where hope dances with laughter, where eyes sparkle with happiness, where angels lift me up to glimpse eternity. I had heard their whispers here and there and silenced their voices. Frustration made me forget my goals, the ones I have been ranking for, and made me see light where only darkness abides. When I returned as a prodigal son to the right path, the one that will always await me no matter how stubborn and blind I become, I found out that the thrill was a delusion full of false promises, a blur that dazzled my confused mind. Since then, I feel lighter and things are going with a dreamlike smoothness.